Top 10: Vintage Vibrators & A Brief History Lesson

Top 10: Vintage Vibrators & A Brief History Lesson

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By Miles Holden on August 26, 2011

With all the buzz going around since the official release of the Hysteria trailer all everyone is talking about is a woman’s best friend, the vibrator. I could make a pun about how all this vibrator hysteria, but I won’t. I have more class than that…or do I?

Hysteria, starring Hugh Dancy and Maggie Gyllenhaal, is a cheeky rom-com about the invention of the vibrator. You see, the magical vibrating wand that will make a woman orgasm over and over again was not invented for sexual purposes, but rather to treat women who were suffering from the medical condition, hysteria.

Hysteria a medical condition solely attributed to women is no longer recognized as an actual disorder, but used to be diagnosed in women who were considered to have a tendency to cause a little too much trouble with their antics.

The “treatment” for hysteria involved manually massaging an “ill” women’s pelvic region until she reached hysterical paroxysm (i.e. orgasm). Apparently, this was in no way sexual and doctors found it hard work; often reporting sore wrists and hands.

Many a woman would argue that things haven’t changed much…

That’s why so many women are incredibly happy that vibrators where invented to help these good old doctors perform their work with more ease. Fortunately for women, the practice of performing pelvic massages on hysterical women has long been abolished, but the vibrator continues to work its magic in a much better context.

From their humble beginnings, I present to you the top ten best (and odd) vintage vibrators I was able to unearth for your viewing pleasure. (Pics via Babeland)

10. Norelco Massager – 1969

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Looks to me like the forbearer of the famous Hitachi Wand.

9. Shavex All Purpose Massager – 1965

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All purpose, huh? I get your drift, but “Shavex” that sounds dangerous to me.

8. Maid Rite – 1965

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A poor woman’s little helper.

7. Niagara Hand Unit (Model 1) – 1952

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Looks like an old school microphone. Now, all I can imagine is the sounds a vagina makes. Sort of like a velvet echo…if you ask me.

6. Andis Vibrator – 1942

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I think you could polish your floors with this beast!

5. Oster Stim-u-Lax Jr. – 1940

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Truly terrifying.

4. Massage Master (VII) – 1928

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Accessories and a handy little case?! Sold.

3. Vibra King – 1922

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Will bring you to orgasm and scrabble your eggs for breakfast.

2. Vibroette – 1920

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What is she doing to her face? I didn’t know a woman’s cheek was an erogenous zone.

1. Arnold Massage Vibrator (no.1) – 1915

arnold-massager-1

Rod and reel: have an orgasm and go on a fishing trip for an all-around good time

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