Top 5: Celebrity Merkins in Movies & TV

Top 5: Celebrity Merkins in Movies & TV

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By Miles Holden on September 14, 2012

First off, let me introduce you to the wonderful world of merkins. To put it simply, a merkin is a pubic wig. They got their start back in the Jack the Ripper days of prostitution when hookers used to shave their pubic hair to get rid of lice, crabs and the like.

Of course, nowadays chicks shave their pubes for purely aesthetic reasons, but back in the day pubes were all the rage. A bald puss-puss on your favorite prostitute wasn’t the style of the day or century and to make sure the money kept rolling in, prostitutes would fashion little triangular wigs (from hair they got god knows where) and then affix them to their vulvas with glue.

These days, merkins are most often used by actresses who need to fluff up their genitals in historical nude scenes (a bald eagle just wouldn’t do in a movie set in the ‘70s); to circumvent the dreaded R-rating (pubes are okay, but lips are a big no-no, which is why all the extras in Harold & Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay wore merkins during the infamous no pants party); or just for laughs (think Anna Farris’ jungle pubes in Scary Movie).

All those times you pat yourself on the back (or whatever other area of your body) when you finally saw that special celebrity’s pubes on the big screen, you were most likely fooled. Fooled, I tell ya.

5. Patricia Arquette – Human Nature

In this little movie about a guy raised by apes (monkeys, wolves, I don’t know), Patricia Arquette plays a character who has a medical condition that makes hair grow over her entire body. She spends most of the flick shaving, everything except her pubes, which you can see in a scene where she runs naked through the woods.

Apparently, Patricia was so adamant about not showing her real pubes on film (maybe she’s not a real blonde?) that she fashioned her own merkin out of hair she found in the prop closet. Where there’s a will, there’s a way.

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4. Kim Cattrall – Sex And The City

I used to live with this gay dude who decided to bleach his pubes one day and dye his thatch Manic Panic Red. It was a disaster. The whole thing turned orange and for a while there he sported Ronald McDonald pubic hair.

Kim Cattrall had the same problem when she tried a similar experiment in Sex In The City, when she discovered a gray hair on her cooter. The merkin they used is a horrible sight to be scene. I just don’t buy it; there’s no way Kim’s character would have such an unruly bush.

(NSFW image here).

3. Kate Winslet – The Reader

“The film is set in the 50s, I couldn’t have just had a landing strip! I had to grow the hair down there. But because of years of waxing, as all of us girls know, it doesn’t come back quite the way it used to. They even made me a merkin – a wig – because they were so concerned that I might not be able to grow enough,” Winslet told Allure magazine. That’s movie history right there folks!

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2. Evan Rachel Wood – Mildred Pierce

Little McWood hottie had her first experience going full frontal in the HBO movie Mildred Pierce (starring Kate Winslet). About the experience she had this to say:

"I was a lot more nervous than I thought I was going to be," she said. "I looked at Kate and she was like, ‘You’ve got to do it. Trust me, it’s so brave. Put a merkin on and you’ll be fine.’... Let’s just say, I had to wear a wig because it was in the '30s, and everything had to look like it was in the '30s." 

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1. Sasha Grey – Entourage

Sasha Grey, beloved and retired pornstar, created quite a stir on the Internet a few years ago when she appeared full naked on the HBO hit series Entourage sporting a full bush. It went a little something like this: “Eww, pubes,” “OMG, a chick with pubes,” “WTF, a PORNSTAR with pubes.” If this idiot had taken a second to watch some actual Sasha Grey porn they would have seen that she frequently sports a nice little bush, but everyone and their mother insists that she wore a merkin for this particular scene. Personally, I don’t buy it. I mean, Grey isn’t exactly shy about showing off her pubic hair and we all know she has some, but because of the controversy this whole thing created I thought she deserved the number one spot.

(NSFW image here).

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